You've Been Asleep for a Hundred Seconds

Sunday, August 22, 2004

The Wonders of Local Casino-oriented Programming

Last night after seeing the good but underwhelming We Don't Live Here Anymore, Headstart and I witnessed the best bit of local TV programming since Bill Nye left Almost Live, KIRO 7's Tulalip Casino Night. It is a combination of reality show, poker tv, and Indian casino infomercial. It is hosted by Gaard Swanson and it consists of a bunch of teams of two with silly names like Eastside Playaz or Hit Men. The teams compete in Baccarat, Roulette, Black Jack, and Texas Hold'em. I think the prize is some fancy vacation.

In the episode we watched our favorite teams were Double Trouble, a couple of skanky overtanned friends with too much make up and bad skin, and Twin Deuces a pair of 79 year old bald twins that wear ugly glasses and matching shortsleeve shirt ensembles. The show is very low budget and cheesy in the best possible way. Dorkmaster host Swanson is not the sole host; there is a former Miss Universe that just seems to stand around and look pretty and a creepy gambling expert named George that seems to focus on coming up stupid zingers than in giving any real insight.

The funniest part about the show is that there were hardly any real commercials. Mostly just KIRO promos and public service announcements from the Boy Scouts. Next week is the last episode with an hour long Texas Hold'em showdown. It should not be missed!


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