Successlessness

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Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Battle Beasts

I have long held that the most compelling television show ever would be if Animal Planet could throw out all their ethics and start a show pitting different types of animals in a fight to the death. It would be completely wrong and evil but just imagine: lion vs. tiger, tabby vs. chihuahua, toucan vs. parrot, cougar vs. wolf, eagle vs. leopard; cockroach vs. dung beetle, or two roosters vs. a single turkey. I'd hate myself for it but I'd be glued to the set for every episode; especially that rooster-turkey show down.

I was reminded of this idea by the upcoming Bears-Colts Super Bowl match up. Now an actual show down between a colt and a grizzly bear would be awesome. Would the young horse speed and kicking power overcome the grizzly's strength and agressiveness? I think it all depends on the size of the arena. The colt wins if it has room to run, but the bear takes it easily if its a fight in small quarters.

While not nearly as exciting as the real deal the videos on Bear vs. Colt are a welcome substitute. I'm rooting for Bear because Colt comes off as a total ass.

In the actual game I'm rather conflicted about who to root for as I have strong strain of hatred for both Peyton Mannning and Rex Grossman. Peyton has annoyed me for years with is goofy slack-jawed expression, lack of clutch play, over played TV ads, and the constant references to his brother and father. But at least Peyton is a great player, Rex is a mediocre Quarterback at best and comes of as a spoiled dumb frat boy that you wouldn't want to leave alone with your sister. So i think I have to root for the Colts, but thats a weak endoresment at best.

But who do I think will win? On paper I think the Colts, but he recent death of Barbaro has me wondering if this is going to be a bad week for colts all around or if the Indianapolis Colts will be inspired to avenge his death.

Screw it. Rex Grossman sucks. The Colts will win and cover

1 Comments:

At 1/31/2007 9:40 PM, Blogger Misty said...

I'm going to take the roosters over the turkey.

Also, I believe that the Colts will avenge the death of Barbaro and come out victorious.

 

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